Wednesday, April 18, 2007

Just another day in paradise

Yesterday was my day to change my infusion set. I got up, got ready, & took my pump off. The change was no different than normal. I checked my blood sugar and bolused, ate breakfast & headed to work. I always set my pump to go off 2 hours after I bolus. This helps me remember to keep an eye on my post food sugar levels. When my pump went off that morning, I had been swamped all day and was already in a grouchy mood. I pulled my meter out of my purse and checked my sugar. Five seconds later 463 pops up on my meter screen. I nearly passed out. I immediately went to the restroom and pulled the infusion set. This was no accident on my part, I knew, there had to be a pump malfunction. And sure enough, the cannula did not go into my skin (how did that happen???), but was just on top of my skin, under the tape. This would explain not getting a "NO DELIVERY" alert. The insulin was delivering. Just not into me! This would also explain my grouchy mood & headache. I really should listen to my body better. I was having all the signs. Stupid me just ignored them.
I actually even checked my ketones at the same time. I was spilling moderate ketones. That made me panic a little, but with a number that high, I had to remind myself, I should have been spilling some.
I put in a new set & bolused right away. I also began drinking water like it was going out of style.
Still paranoid, about an hour later, I pulled the second set and put in another one. Rechecking my blood sugar levels showed that it was coming down some, but I was still way about 300. I bolused again. (I know, be careful not to "stack").
By this time, my head was swimming and I couldn't concentrate very well. And grouchy is just a nice word for my actual mood. I work with a lady who's husband has been a type 1 diabetic for most of his life. She offered to see my appointments and let me go home. But I am stubborn. I refuse to let this disease limit me. High blood sugars is not a good reason (in my mind) to go home. But I loved her concern. And her understanding. Her husband is also on a insulin pump.
At lunch time, I was down to about 230. That was getting better. It still wasn't great, but I could handle that.
By about 4:30, I was a nice, safe 75. I could eat dinner and still be okay.
Part of me was so upset and frustrated while this was happening. "Why me?" I wanted to yell. I mostly just wanted to cry.
But I didn't. I just picked myself up by the bootstraps (sorry for the southern reference, I can't help it) and went on. This is going to happen occasionally. It is part of life.
And yesterday, was for me, just another day in the paradise that is the life of this diabetic.

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