There was a time when I didn't take care of myself. I didn't want to and didn't think about the consequences of my actions. As a young person, you often think about only the present. The future is so far off and has nothing to do with your current life. Or so we like to think. I believe this is often the case with diabetics who don't take care of themselves and end up with horrible complications. I understand that it is not fun to have to check your blood sugar. I get the fact that you don't want to have to deal with the lows and the awful feelings that come with them. I have lived this life for 22 years.
But, I also had a very dear doctor set me straight at a time in my life when I didn't think about all of these things. All I could think about was that I was in college and I didn't want to have to deal with diabetes. My general practitioner hadn't seen me in some time, and finally refused to refill my insulin until I came into the office to see him. When I did, he had an a1c done. When it came back it was 12.1. Twice what it should be. He looked me dead in the eye & told me not to bother finishing college 'cause it wouldn't do any good. He told me I was going to die, unless I did something to fix this problem. And it was the shocker I needed to get me on the right track to controlling my diabetes.
I didn't get perfect during this time. I didn't get better overnight. But I am at a place in my life now where I feel like I have a better handle on this disease than it has on me. I understand what I have to do to take care of myself, and for the most part, I do that.
The biggest thing that I want to be able to say is that I didn't die from diabetes! I don't want "complications related to diabetes" to be my cause of death. I want to die an old lady, in my bed asleep. Or in a boating accident when I am 65 and learning to ski. I want to have children and watch them grow up. And I know I can't do that unless I control diabetes.
People talk about how awful it is to be a diabetic. How many of their friends/sisters/uncles/second-cousins have died of diabetes. It's like they are wondering if I am going to die too. I refuse to die too. I don't want to become a statistic. And I will do everything in my power to prevent that from happening.