Tuesday, May 22, 2007

A Scary Moment

I had an interesting day yesterday. I woke up with a headache that felt surprisingly like a migraine I had one time. I was feeling like crap & took some headache medicine to try to keep it from getting any worse. About 2 hours after I took the medicine, the headache eased off. Thank God. But then severe heartburn set in right before my lunch. I am not sure why. I rarely, if ever, have heartburn. I did my best at lunch to eat a meal that was low in grease & other heartburn creating foods. It did okay, and that also eased off.

I had a chiropractor appointment that evening and left work a little early to get there in time. When I got there, I checked my blood sugar & was a little surprised to get a reading of 74. I turned my pump off and went on into the office. About 1/2 and hour later, when I got out of the appointment, my blood sugar was up to 86. I like numbers like that.

I went onto Wal-Mart to try to get an organizer for my closet. I didn't find the one I wanted, but I did find a book and a bag of peanut M & M's :D I went ahead and ate them and gave some insulin (not for the whole bag) because I knew I had an hour drive ahead of me and I didn't want my blood sugars to shoot through the roof before I got home.

Fast forward one hour: I got home and fixed myself dinner. A peanut butter & grape jelly sandwich on wheat bread. Yummm. When I checked my blood sugar it was 63!!!! YIKES! When did that happen? I ate first and waited about 35 minutes to bolus. I wanted to give my blood sugar time to come up. Two hours after my bolus my blood sugar was 53!!! What is going on?????? I don't have a clue. I don't know why this is happening. But I ate a zebra cake and didn't give any insulin at all. Yet another hour later my blood sugar is still in the 50s. I can't figure this out.

By this time I am laying on my couch trying my best not to fall asleep. I know it is because of the blood sugars, not because I am tired. My body on auto-pilot, I got a box of honey nut cheerios out of the cabinet and began to eat them straight from the box. All my thoughts are fuzzy. I can't make a coherent thought, I just know that I need to eat something. If I had been thinking coherently, I would have realized that I had juice boxes left over from teaching Sunday School sitting on my kitchen table. This would have taken care of the problem quickly.

One of my friends called me while I lay in my semi-coherent, cheerio eating state. She knew right away that something was wrong by the way I was talking. To say the least, I wasn't forming sentences that made much sense at all. She managed to get out of me what had been going on. That I had been fighting this demon low all evening and I was loosing at this point. She talked to me until I started making sense again & was able to check my blood sugar and it was at a safe 140.

Then she yelled at me. I love her for it. She told me that I should have called to let someone know that I was fighting the lows. "What would have happened if you had gone unconscious?" she asked. I didn't have any answers for her. I live alone. My family & friends call me frequently, but sometimes it may not be frequent enough to catch it if something was wrong.

I wanted to cry. Not because she yelled at me, but because I don't have any answers. And yes, it scares me. I don't know what would have happened if I hadn't been able to eat enough to get the blood sugar up. I was scared. For me, for my friends and family. I have lived alone for years. I don't know that I have ever had an episode that really bothered me emotionally like the one from last night. I was disturbed.

Maybe I should have a roommate. Maybe it isn't smart for me to live alone. I don't even like to think that. I am so independent and I have lived alone for the past 6 years, give or take a few months that I lived with a friend and her husband between jobs.

The ugly monster of diabetes reared it's head last night. No control and no reason for it. I wasn't sick. In fact, when I checked at midnight (on the orders from my dear friend with instructions to call her and let her know what the blood sugars were) I was 110 and this morning, due to over treatment, I was 364.
It was just weird. A fluke. Another thing with this crazy disease that can't be explained and can't be made to go away. No matter how perfect I try to be, it seems like there's always the times like last night that make it almost not worth it.


Drea said...

I have nights like that from time to time.....for instance right now, I am surfing the blogs, but really I was to be asleep...but I have to make sure my sugar goes up before I drift to sleep! (too much insulin for my pizza earlier!!!)....I am glad your friend was there for ya. It is not easy...but you know you needed to eat and you did!

..M.. said...

Sounds like a freaky time :-s And a wonderful friend!

You're certainly not alone in having strange days like that. I once spent about 4 - 5 hours eating & drinking to fight off a low that seemed to come from nowhere, and didn't want to leave again. Not a clue where it came from, my only thought was that my Lantus absorbed oddly. Days like this are always a challenge, but I'm glad we're here to see another day (and a new challenge!)

D is never quite as predictable as we'd like, is it?!