Monday, August 15, 2011

Letting Go: My Mother's Story

This is going to be one of the hardest posts for me to put up here. I asked my mother to write something for the "Your Voice" project. I knew she would have the perfect words to say and I was right. I love my mom. She's one of my best friends and one of the most genuine and kind people I know in the world. Although I like to think I got some of my better traits from her, I still wish I could be more like her. Some people say they dread the thought of turning into their mother. I say that it would be a honor for me to turn out like her.




I am the mother of a daughter with Type 1 diabetes for 25 years. She is now 30 years young and loving life as far as I can tell. I spent her childhood on a roller coaster of emotions trying to prepare her for her adult life, always hoping for some middle ground so that she would be able to have some peace in her life.

I have felt all, I repeat all, of the anxieties of a mother letting her chronically ill child grow up. The one I wish to share today is perhaps the most trying of all. Going thru school, living at home, she needed us to help her in just about every way. being 30 she needs us to understand her life and let her live it. Thank God she is doing just that. She has refused to allow this monster that looks over her shoulder 24 hours a day 7 days a week to control her life. I have so much love and admiration for my little girl (and yes she is still little 4' 11") and it is a joy to stand back and see what she has become. Strong, independent, a blessing to everyone who knows her and a friend like no other, the kind that you can rely on no mater what. She lights up every room and never stops amazing those of us who love her.

She keeps things from me, I know she does. It is a part of the process. She cannot have her freedom if she keeps calling for help. That is how she sees it and that is the only thing that matters. I am there for her, and she knows it. I ask question when I must (you know moms) and I read between the lines a lot. We know each other through and through and that helps. I have confidence in our balanced diplomacy of things I do not ask and things she feels I need to know. This is a balancing act of sorts but it is so worth it. For her to live her life her way regardless of what tomorrow may bring is the only way. I must love her and let her, for with out that freedom it would be no life at all.


Thanks you, Mom, for writing this. You do a fantastic job of letting me live my life. You always say that God blessed you with me. But He blessed me with you as well.

9 comments:

Karen G said...

You mom is amazing - now I know where you get it from. :)

~Suzanne~ said...

Ahhh, this post was so special... I am crying like a baby over here!! What an awesome Momma! :)

Grammie said...

Love the post, I'm a mom of a 24 year old, she's not diabetic, I'm the one with diabetes. But I too listen, read between the lines, ask questions when needed, make suggestions, but let her be who she is and when she needs me she calls. I love the title of your blog I'm newly diagnosed 6 months now and that is exactly how I feel about this condition, it is constantly on my mind.

Scott said...

Thanks so much for sharing this from your mother. She sounds amazing!

Sara said...

Wow. That seems like a difficult balance but its seems like your mom got a pretty good result :)

Michael Hoskins said...

What a special and awesome post! Thank you so much for sharing your perspective, Cara's mom! You are a true superhero, and it's so great to read your insights here about just some of those adventures.

Nicole said...

That was beautiful!!

I don't know what I'm going to do when my Cara is all grown up & loving life!!

I guess there is nothing more to do then just smile :)

Cara said...

Nicole- I hope & pray that by the time your Cara is grown up and living her life that she won't have to worry about diabetes anymore. :)

shannon said...

thanks to both you and your mom for sharing.