The Craziest Hobby Ever (For a Diabetic)

There are people who's names fit them. Like the dentist named Moller. Or the teacher named Learner. It happens. Sometimes people and things just fit together. I am a little bit different than that. I have a lot of different hobbies. I love, love, love to scrapbook! I like to sew, and have been learning to knit. I also like to cook. I read everything I can get my hands on.

But I have this one hobby that should be a total no-no for a diabetic. I love to decorate cakes. Yeah, I know its crazy. Let's give the diabetic a cake mix and a 2 pound bag of powdered sugar and let her make a cake. It makes perfect sense, right? Or not. Sometime I wonder if inhaling all that powdered sugar, as I am making my frosting, is making my blood sugar go up. Is that even possible? I don't know.

But all you diabetics, know that I don't actually eat all the cakes I make. I usually take them to family, or friends, or to work (they love going in the break room and seeing a cake). Yesterday I made a cake and took it to my neighbors today. I didn't even taste it.

I just find it kind of ironic, that as a diabetic, I would pick a hobby that puts me in close contact with the very types of foods that we should stay away from. Or at least only have in moderation. Oh well, I never claimed that I was normal. It's just something else about me that is hard to explain.

Is there anything that you like to do that doesn't fit "the mold" of a diabetic?

No Delivery

I changed my infusion set yesterday morning. Nothing different about the change. No weird feelings or anything like that. My blood sugar even ran pretty normal all day long. I didn't have any insane spikes or crazy readings.

Then last night I got my dinner made and was just sitting down to eat. I tested my blood sugar. It was 73. Not terribly low, but it was certainly time to eat. I bolused and started to eat. About three bites into my food my pump starts buzzing like crazy. Without even looking at it, I knew what it was. I didn't want to look. I didn't want to see. But I knew it had to be done.

I pulled my pump out of my pocket..... NO DELIVERY. Of course this has happened to me before. But not in several months. I've really had not major problems in quite some time.

So, I sit my plate aside, walk into my bathroom and get out my pump supplies and change my infusion set. Oh well. It all worked out. Sure my food was a little cold when I ate, but no biggie. It could be worse. I might not have a pump. Or I might live somewhere where I have no insulin. Or we could live in a world without the technology to home test for blood sugar levels.

I guess when it comes down to it, as much as I hate those stupid NO DELIVERY alerts, I feel pretty lucky. I feel blessed to not have complications after 22 years of diabetes. I feel blessed to have a job that provides me with great health coverage. I feel blessed that I have an insulin pump. I feel blessed that technology has come so far in the years since I was diagnosed.

Sometimes its just in how you look at the situation that makes it easier to handle.

Diabetes Crazy

The past few days have been absolutely crazy in my world. I had family in from out of state, my grandmother was put into the hospital and is now, temporarily, residing in the nursing home, and I have been dealing with blood sugar readings that are driving me NUTS!!

I think that the crazy readings are partially due to the stress and also have to do with me not being as careful about what I eat & when I test. It's frustrating that a time like this can have such a control over my diabetes. But I think it is just part of life.

So for those of you who read my blog, please remember me in your prayers and thoughts. Hopefully by the end of the week things will have slowed down and my life will be getting back to semi-normal.

Thanks and sorry for such a short post!

Meter Comparison

While I was at the JDRF Walk last Saturday I picked up two meters from booths. I have been thinking about getting a new meter, not to mention the fact that I did not have a spare meter on hand. The meters that I got were the Accu-Chek Aviva and the Bayer Ascensia Contour. I am currently using the Paradim Link from BD that is linked with my MiniMed Pump.

This is what I found about each of the meters:

I really liked the Accu-Chek Aviva's case, it's thin design, and the lancet device. Actually, I LOVED the lancet device! The multiclix lancet device was really comfortable and the lancets aren't single. It is a drum with 6 lancets that you can change each time (or less) and you only change the lancet drum after using all the lancets. The Accu-Chek also is a preferred strip on my insurance. Which means less out of pocket for me.

The Bayer Contour was a nice machine. As I will talk about later, it had the results that were closer to my current meter. I did not like the lancet device. It was (in my mind) a throw-back to the older lancet devices in it's design. It wasn't painful, but it was just kind of odd in shape and style. The Bayer strips are not on my insurance's preferred list, therefore it would be more out of pocket cost than some other strips.

The Paradigm Link is my current meter. I have been using it for a little over a year. I really like the fact that it links to my pump and all the results (from both my pump & my meter) can be downloaded to my account on the MiniMed website and I can see averages, trends, etc. I don't like that I waste a LOT of strips when testing with this meter. If the amount of blood is not exactly right you have to retest. I also don't like that the strips are not on my insurance's preferred list. I end up paying more out-of-pocket costs for my strips.

This were the major likes and dislikes of these 3 meters. Then came the biggest thing of all: the blood sugar results. I checked my blood sugar on all three meters at the same time. The results were disturbingly different.

BD: 103
Accu-Chek: 151
Contour: 119

On the second testing at a different time:

BD: 135
Accu-Chek: 160
Contour: 124

The strikingly funny thing was the the Accu-Chek was higher than the other two meters both times. And the Accu-Chek was also the only meter of the 3 that was on the preferred list for strips on my insurance. So are the other 2 meters the better meters? And therefore I have to pay extra for my strips? Is it just because the insurance company doesn't want to pay for the strips for the meters that are more accurate?
Has anyone else had this experience? I swear the more I learn about diabetes the less I feel like I know. And this is after 22 years of living with this disease.

JDRF Walk!

September 29th, 2007 was the Nashville Walk to Cure Diabetes. I went with my mom & sister & we had a wonderful day. Lots of free stuff (I got 2 new meters to try out!) and free food. And just in general spent some time around others wanting the same thing I do: A CURE!
It was the first time I had ever attended an even like this. I was highly impressed & had a lot of fun. I am hoping to go back again next year. I raised a total of $535. I figure for a first timer, that was pretty good. Next year I'll shoot for more! Thanks to all those who helped me out. Know that it went to a wonderful cause.
I haven't been posting lately, so I am very sorry about that. I am going to be working on posting at least a couple of times per week. I have got to get better about this!

Follow-up for CGMS

I went to the doctor's office yesterday to talk with my doctor about the results from my trial with the CGMS. It was very good, I think. We talked about the fact that it wasn't always correct with my meter results. But he was still very happy with my "graph" for the 3 days. He said that it looked like I had very few spikes in my blood sugars. The only things he seemed concerned about were my low blood sugars. Which is really what I have been worried about myself.
We decided to change a few of my basal rates and change my insulin to carb ratios for lunch time. These were things that I had contemplated doing myself, but wanted to wait to get the opinion of someone else.
I don't have any issues with making changes on my own, if I think they are needed. I just knew that a doctor's appointment was coming up, so I held off until I could talk to him about it. And turns out, he said to do exactly what I was going to do. It was nice affirmation that what I am doing is the right thing.
We talked a little bit more about my getting the CGMS for myself. He said he was going to send the letter to the insurance company to see what they would say. I really hope that they approve it. In my doctors words, it would be a tool to help me with my already good control. It would simply help me shave some more digits off my A1c. Which is exactly my idea. I want a LOWER A1c.
Sure, I know 6.7 is good. It's below the recommended 7.0. But it still isn't 6.0. Which is what I would love. Which would mean that my body is basically living like a non-diabetic most of the time. This means less damage. Less complications. And less wear and tear. And with 22 years of this diabetes thing already wearing and tearing on my body, the lower I can get my A1c, the happier I will be.
Wish me luck as I navigate the jungle known as the American health insurance system.

Diabetes: The Invisible Disease

This weekend was a long weekend for me. I left work early on Thursday and took Friday off. It was like a min-vacation. I really needed a break, so it was very nice. A friend and I went to Savannah, Tennessee to go to Darryl Worley's Tennessee River Run. Basically it was a festival-like concert on the Tennessee River at Pickwick State Park. It featured Savannah local Darryl Worley, the legendary Charlie Daniels, Trick Pony, and Jason Michael Carroll.

We spend the weekend at Pickwick State Park at their Inn, which was beautiful, clean, and had a wonderful view of the water from our fifth flood balcony. Just having those relaxing few days was very nice.

I have lived fairly close (about 45 minutes) to a lake most of my life. It has given me a love of the water. It is so peaceful and seems to bring a wonderful spirit to my heart. Even on the worst of days I can spend a few hours sitting on the edge of the water and the world seems to fall back into perspective.

Diabetes wise, I had a relatively easy weekend. Nothing about 180 and very few lows. The interesting thing that I discovered is how very invisible diabetes can be...except to other diabetics. I've always known that people don't realize I have diabetes most of the time. I've known people for months and them say, "I didn't know you were diabetic!" Others find out in a very short time. It just seems like it comes up sooner in conversation with some people than with other people.

While I was at the concert on Saturday night I was looking around at the people. I tend to be a people watcher at times. I think it is part of my inverted nature. There was a couple sitting about 15 feet away from me. They were probably in their early to mid 40's. The man got up and went to get something and I looked at the woman. She wasn't looking at me, but I saw her, very discretely, open a small cooler and get out a glucose monitor and some insulin. She was so good at hiding what she was doing, I didn't catch the brand names of either product, but I could tell that she checked her blood sugar. Then she drew up insulin in a syringe and gave herself an injection through her jeans. Unless you were really paying attention, you would never have known what was going on. Unless you were another diabetic, I would venture to say, you wouldn't have noticed it at all.

I didn't say anything to the lady. I don't know who she was, what type of diabetes she has, or anything else about her. But I know that we share a bond. She may never know about it, but I do.

So diabetes can be invisible. Almost. Us diabetics can almost always pick up on it.

Adventures in Constant Glucose Monitoring

Okay, so I went on Friday to pick up the MiniMed minilink CGMS from my doctor's office. It was basically a loaner for 3 days. I left work at noon and headed, with a friend, out of town to go to my endo's office. My endo is about an hour from my house. My friend wanted to get some shopping in and needed to go to Verizon. I just needed to stop by my doctor's office and get "hooked-up" to the sensor.

I went into the office at about 1:30. This is when the nurse and I had agreed for me to come pick up the sensor. When I got there she came out to tell me that it hadn't been brought back by the last patient and asked me if I could come back closer to 3:30. I told her this was fine. We went to shop for a while & then headed back to the office.

When I got there I will have to say I was a little nervous. I don't really know why, but I think it might have been more "I'm on my way to get my brand new car" nervous more than a "I am getting ready to jump out of a plane" nervous. The nurse actually inserted the device for me. I was kind of disappointed about that, as I wanted to do it by myself, but that was okay. It didn't hurt and I was ready to go in about 5 minutes. Short and sweet. Just like I like my doctor's office visits.

My friend and I headed out to do some more shopping and to look at some things for her upcoming wedding. As we were leaving on store my pump all of a sudden starts beeping like crazy! It was like it had a mind of it's own. I got my pump out and read the screen: "Sensor Error: Sensor failure. Self test. See owner's manual."

You know, that would be my luck. I tear everything up. So I got out my cell phone and called the office back & told them what it said. She asked me if I could come back in. I went back & she looked at it. Studied the owner's manual. Pushed a few buttons. And them promptly looked at me and said, "I have no idea what's wrong. It's never done this before." Gee. How lucky can I get?? We finally got the screen to clear back up. It appeared to be working and she told me to go ahead and leave & if it didn't start working to come back in on Monday and they would try it again.

Luckily, I left and the sensor started working pretty quickly after that. I have no idea, still, what was wrong with it. I don't think the nurse does either. Oh, well.

Overall the weekend was a little crazy for me. I have about a million things to do and part of me become OCD about checking my pump & then testing my blood sugar to verify. For Friday evening, Saturday, & then Sunday morning, the CGMS was nearly 30 points off almost every time I tested. It failed to catch my low blood sugars a couple of times and there were some high blood sugars that didn't show up either.

To be honest, I was starting to get a little worried and frustrated with the whole deal. But then Sunday afternoon it started matching up. It was within 10 points nearly every time I tested. (If you listen closely you can hear the hallelujah chorus!) Then, I talked to someone today who told me that it usually takes them a few days before the CGSM and the meter start matching. This person wears the sensor for around a week at a time.

I have an appointment next week to discuss with my doctor the results of the three day trial. I am going to voice my concerns over the sensor not matching for the first couple of days. But, to be honest, I still want one. I think that the technology is going to keep improving and I think it is still a nice thing to have, especially if it starts matching up withing a few days.

I'm still not sure about the insurance thing. How that will go is still up in the air. I'll keep you all updated on how it goes.

A Long Weekend and CGMS News

So, it was a long weekend. No work yesterday. And I think I am more tired now than when I left work on Friday. So here's how my weekend went:

Friday I left work early. I went to meet a friend's sister to catch a ride to Shelbyville, Tennessee. Locals know that the last week in August through the first Saturday in September is the Tennessee Walking Horse National Celebration. It is 11 days of horse shows that ends the first Saturday night in September and crowns the World Grand Champion Tennessee Walking Horse. To some this may seem boring. To those who have experienced it, you know better. Just imagine the Kentucky Derby. Only 11 days long and all the horses are Tennessee Walking Horses instead of race horses. There is a lot of dressing up and expense that goes into the clothes and the shoes and the purses and the jewelry for the women. Not everyone dresses up, but it is almost like a contest for some of the people to see who can dress up the most.

Anyway, I went down on Friday night to catch the Friday night show and then the Saturday night show when the World Grand Champion was crowned. I have gone for the last three years and I have to say it is one of the highlights of my year. I stayed with friends who were also going and spent a lot of time running around. Below is a picture of Master of Jazz, this year's World Grand Champion with his trainer, Jimmy McConnell

The bad part on the diabetes (and the weight) was that I ate out. A lot. Every meal. It was hard to pick and sometimes just to find healthy foods. I don't always eat the best in the world, but I do try to keep a decent type diet. The really funny thing was that one of the concession stands at the show grounds (think cheesburgers, hot dogs, and funnel cakes) had "fresh fruit cup with dip" listed as an option! I was shocked. This just goes to show you that there are people trying to eat healthy in the world. I ordered the fruit cup (no dip). It was a good sized serving of fresh melon, grapes, and strawberries. It was nice. The really bad part is that I also ordered a serving of fried Oreos. That's right. You read that correctly. Fried Oreos. Basically they are dipped in funnel cake batter and then fried. And man were they good! I didn't think the would be, but I had to buy them just to see what they were. And they were the best thing I have had in a long time. Yes, I hear all you health nuts gasping in astonishment. That's okay. I understand. But I looked at it this way: At least I got fresh fruit and fried Oreos instead of a cheeseburger and fried Oreos. Which is what I really wanted.

So here's my advice to all the diabetics: try fried Oreos at least once in your life. You might like them.

I really didn't have any horrible lows. And not horrible highs. The highest my blood sugar was all weekend was around 170. And I did have a 59, but it was corrected with a juice box from my purse and a pack of Welch's fruit snacks.

So food wise, my weekend wasn't the healthiest. But blood sugar wise, I did okay. Eating all of schedule was a little weird. And eating at all hours of the day was very weird. But I survived.

And the most important thing is that the Celebration was wonderful and I had a great time!

Now for the CGMS news. My doctor's office called me today. They want me to come in Thursday or Friday to get the sensor from the doctor's office. I will basically borrow it for 3 days and then I will take it and my graph results back to my doctor. This may give him more to use when he asks the insurance company for me to get my own CGMS. Not to mention that I will have a basic idea of how it works and what to expect if I should get one of my own.

I am a little bit excited. And a little bit scared. I will keep you all updated on when I get the sensor and how my days with the sensor are working out.

Part of me thinks that I will hate it and not want one. The other part of me thinks I will love it and not want to worry about catching my low blood sugars anymore. That would be a miracle. And very nice.

The little victories and little defeats

I had my doctor's appointment today. Before I went I downloaded all my pump information & printed off the results for my doctor. I made a list of things that I needed a prescription for and made a list of all the things that I wanted to ask my doctor about. I was ready to face my doctor, get my A1c results, and find out what I needed to do to get a CGMS for my pump.

Of course when I got to the office I had to wait for TWO HOURS before I could get in to the back. And then waited another 15 minutes to see the doctor. I like him. Really I do. But the booking is a little crazy.

Anyway, back to my story. I got called back and they weighed me. I don't weigh at home. I would be obsessed with it if I did. I knew I had gained some weight back. It was about 5 pounds. A little defeat. I have been trying so hard to keep the weight off. I hate it that I had gained some back. This makes me that much more determined to start exercising on a regular basis. I want to loose about 15 to 30 pounds. I know it can be done. I just have to get off my butt and do it!

When my doctor came in and gave me my A1c results I was really hoping for a lower A1c. It didn't happen. My last A1c was 6.6. Today it was 6.7. I know it's not much of an increase. But it's there. And I don't like it. Another little defeat.

Now on to the little victories. My microalbumin urine test came back good. No problems. No spilling protein. My cholesterol was okay. And there were no other abnormal test results. This is very good to hear. Twenty-two years is a long time and I know sometimes that I am playing a fine line to have no complications. I want to keep it that way for as long as I possibly can.

Another good thing is that I spoke with my doctor about getting the Constant Glucose Monitoring System for my Minimed 722 pump. I have wanted this for some time, but was afraid that my insurance would turn it down. But one of my co-worker's has the same type of insurance that I do and they pay for her husband's CGMS. So today I asked my doctor what we could do about getting it for me. He asked me several questions about my blood sugars. When do I go low? How often? Can I tell when my blood sugar is dropping? Then he said he would write a letter of medical necessity to the insurance company and we would see what would happen. My doctor's office also has the Minilink that he loans out for about 3 days at a time to patients to try out. He put me on the list to get this and set me up and appointment for 6 weeks from now.

So, I had some little victories. I had a few little defeats. But overall, there was no terrible news. There was nothing that needed to be changed drastically. I got my prescription for test strips increased to 10 per day. I got prescription for a glucogon pen.

I will definitely let you all know when I get the CGMS on trial from my doctor's office. It may be a little while, but I will keep you all updated. Wish me luck! :)

I finally did it!

Okay, after having my diabetic melt down the other day I decided that I needed to get off my tail and download my pump & meter to see how much damage has truly been done. When I posted last, I said I hadn't downloaded in almost a week. In fact, as of today, it had been 9 days. More than a week. I didn't realize how far off I was.

But I did it. I downloaded all the information. And as it was generating reports, I couldn't help but be a little worried. I knew I wasn't going to like the results. My two week average blood sugar: 139. I'm not happy with that, since lately it had been running around 120. I like 120 much better than 139. The last time I was on, I looked at my 3 month average & it was holding steady at 129. Today, it was 130. Not a huge difference. But it still shows that the last two weeks has had an effect on me.

So now it's time. Time to pull myself up by my bootstraps, as they say down here in the South. I need to keep on. Monday is my appointment with the endo. I will finally get to see my A1c for the first time in 6 months. The last one was 6.6 and I would really like this one to be lower. Somehow, I don't know if it will be. Those of you who read this blog, please pray with me. And for me. I want all good things at this appointment. And I want to convince my endo that I WANT to be seen every 3 months. I have decided that this 6 month deal isn't working for me. I don't like it.

On my agenda for the endo:

-Check on CGMS as I think my insurance will now pay for it!

-Ask that my test strip prescription be increased from 7 tests per day to 10 test per day.

-Get a prescription for a glucogon pen (I have NEVER had one!)

I am looking forward to this appointment (Yeah, I know I'm weird). I am hoping for a lower A1c, but I am really hoping that I can get the CGMS. I think this would be a good thing for me and would really help me with getting tighter control. And that is my ultimate goal: tight control.

So wish me luck. And send prayers my way. I'll keep you all updated on what the outcome is.

Frustrations in General

I have to say the the past several day have not been the best diabetes wise. I have been continually fighting lows or highs. I will have some readings that are great (Like my 2 hr post breakfast of 120 today), but the majority of readings have not been so kind. A couple of nights ago I was waking myself up every 3 hours to check my blood sugar and bolus some insulin. That made for a very sleepy day the next day.


I'm not really sure, to be honest, if it is one of those freak blood sugar times when nothing I do seems to be right, or if I am just slacking on my carb estimations. Could be a little of both I suppose.


I am afraid to download my info from my pump and my meter. I haven't done it in about a week, when I had been downloading every 3 or 4 days. I am just afraid to see what my daily average is.


Could this be the start of diabetes burnout?? I hope not. I want so badly to be a "good diabetic." I really want to get my A1c below 6. Or at least to the low 6's.


I guess I am just flat out frustrated today. Being part of the blogging community, tudiabetes.com, and visiting various message boards helps. But sometimes I think its just not enough. Sometimes I just want to forget I have diabetes. I want to not count every carb I eat & not worry about what my blood sugar is. And not wonder, every time I'm thirsty, if I am just thirsty or if my blood sugar is high. And I am basically just sick of the constant balancing act that is diabetes care.

New Friends

Those of you out there in diabetic-land know what I am about to say.... No one but another diabetic can really understand all that we go through. This is something that I have a hard time with sometimes. Even though my friends listen, and can have some idea of how I'm feeling, it takes another diabetic to understand when you say, "I feel like crap. My blood sugar is getting to me."
I go to church with a couple of Type 1 diabetics. But one is younger than my and the other older than me. So it isn't like I have the time or chance to really sit down and have a good diabetic gripe session.
I remember being at diabetes camp in Georgia when I was about 9 years old. I loved the fact that all the other kids had diabetes too. Even at that age, I knew that it was special that everyone else had to eat like I did and get shots like I did. But other than that time in my life, I have been around no other diabetics that are my age. Or anywhere relatively close.
This weekend I got to change that. A friend of mine came to visit me and brought a friend of hers. The friend of a friend has diabetes too. She is a recently diagnosed Type 1, but it was nice to be able to talk diabetes-talk and to actually know that the other person didn't only understand, but they also related.
It was a blessing this weekend. A chance to be with another person who I knew could understand and relate to me. Although I am not glad that she was diagnosed with diabetes (the thought of another person every having to live with this makes my heart ache), I am glad that I got a chance to meet her. I have made a new friend. One I can stick in the slot of "diabetic friend". It's nice.

Every Day, Every Hour, Every Minute

I have had this blog for several months now. It is a way of release for me. I am able to talk, to no one in particular, about my diabetes. I get to share my views, my frustrations, and other areas of my life that are continually effected by diabetes.

I started this blog after reading Kerri's blog over at Six Until Me. When I was trying to think of a title, I put on my "Kerri brain". This would be the brain where I try my best to think like Kerri. I'm not sure that she would agree that this is a good thing, but when it comes to writing, I believe it is. Kerri has a way with words that I wish I could have.

This would be what happened when I made up my title: I thought about how much that diabetes consumes my life. The first thing I do in the morning: check my blood sugar. The last thing I do at night before bed: check my blood sugar. Every bite of food that enters my mouth: carbs are counted & calculated. Every activity that I do: make sure the blood sugars will be normal (i.e. dropping basal rates, eating extra food, etc.). And constantly being sure that I have something with which to treat a low blood sugar, change an infusion site, or handle a drastic change in schedule.

Every aspect of my life is consumed by this disease. I can ignore it. I can make it less of a priority in my life. I spent years doing this. But I decided that it's "gloves off" time. I am not going to let the grim prospects that most diabetics face, come to me. I want to delay or prevent as many complications as humanly possible. In order to do this, I have to make diabetes a major part of my existence.

If you want the truth, diabetes and I have a love/hate relationship. It loves me (obviously, since it has been around so long! LOL) and I love to hate it. I have a choice to make. I can hate diabetes and ignore it. Or I can hate it and fight it. Head on. Face to face. And that's what I am prepared to do. Even if it takes Every Minute of Every Hour of Every Day.

Hope for a Cure

I have been thinking quite a bit lately, about a cure for diabetes. More & more I am reading about scientists trying to delay the onset of diabetes and saving the beta cells when Type 1 is first detected. I think this is a WONDERFUL thing! To not have any more children have to live through what I did would be such a blessing. And those that are diagnosed later in life with Type 1, to know there would be hope that you could live without worrying about insulin & carb counting would be a miracle.
But part of me worries. I wonder what kind of strides they are making toward curing those of us who have been diabetic for years? It almost depresses me to think that there would be a cure for those newly diagnosed, while there are millions of us who would still have no hope. Is that selfish of me? I want a cure for us all. If a cure for the newly diagnosed comes first, great!
But please, please, please, don't forget the rest of us. Those of us who have 20 plus years of diabetic wear & tear on our bodies. Those of us who know that statistics tell us we will have a shorter life than the average man or woman. Those of us who know, even with the greatest control, we may still have to suffer complications.
We are still out here. Sometimes, on days like today, I start to loose my hope. I don't want that to happen. I want that hope to still be alive. I want a CURE!

I love you Mom & Dad

I love my mother. My Mom is one of my best friends. I say this, not to be cheesy, but as part of a fact of my life. There is little in my life that I don't share with her. She has been my supporter and I have been hers. Over the years, we have shared many experiences that I believe has made us much closer than we might have been.
I called my mother this afternoon. I talk to her almost every day. I called her this afternoon to make plans to take my little sister school shopping on Saturday. Mom and my step-dad need a break from work and stress, and I think I need to spend some quality time with my sister. What better way to solve both problems than for me to take Rach shopping and make her to cutest dressed girl in the sixth grade?
While I was talking to my mother, I told her to get on the Internet and had her look at the video that I posted earlier this week. She watched it and proceeded to cry through the whole thing. I had cried when I watched it. I actually cried the first 3 times I watched it. It just rings so true to my life.
I have often thought about my parents. I know about my life and how it has been effected my diabetes. But what about my parents? What must they have thought when they were told, "Your daughter has diabetes." How terrifying that must have been. They didn't ask for a sick child. They knew nothing about diabetes.
How do parents handle this? Do they cry? Do they shout? Do they blame themselves? Do they blame someone else? Do they go into denial? Do they wish that their child could have been born with some other disease? Or that they were diagnosed with something that could be cured? Or that it was them instead of the child?
I was blessed. I had parents that did take care of me to the best of their ability. They gave me enough self-reliance and also provided me with plenty of support and love. But I often wonder what their thoughts were during that time in my life.
Mom and Dad, I love you. I owe you so much. Thank you for being parents that care, parents that love me, and parents who looked in the face of diabetes and said, "We can do this!"
I'm sorry I might have caused you heartache (I know it wasn't my fault). I'm sorry you lost sleep, money, normalcy in the name of my diabetes. Thank you for being there. Thank you for being parents.

A Beautiful and Very True Look at Diabetes....

This video was e-mailed to me and is NOT my work. But I love it because it so accurately displays what my life has been like for the past 22 years...





http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z2uE0TlBZGc

My Life (Without Diabetes)

I was thinking today about what life would be like without diabetes. It is hard to imagine. For the past 22 years of my life I have lived with watching what I eat, checking my blood sugar, and going to the doctor. Shots went from 2 a day, to 4, and finally to the pump. Each time I hear about new developments in diabetes research, they always say "a cure is just around the corner." But they've been saying that for years.

I know a woman who told me that her friend's daughter is in medical school currently. She was going to go into endocrinology and decided to "double major" (I'm not sure what they call it in med school) because she thinks that by the time she gets out of med school and sets up a practice there will be a cure and she wants to have a specialty that will be around for a while.

That made my heart smile. If a future doctor thinks that a cure is that close, maybe it really is.

I have lived my life eating on schedule. What would it be like to not live like that? Is my body so used to eating 3 meals a day that I wouldn't be able to skip a meal if there was no diabetes? Would I over eat, just because I could? Would I continue to count carbs out of habit? Would I quit going to the doctor on a regular basis and let my overall health slide?

I don't remember life before diabetes. I don't remember drinking Mountain Dew (which my mother says I loved) or eating Captain Crunch (without counting carbs).

I wonder if I would continue to live life like I had diabetes (minus the insulin & testing), just because I always have?

I know this is a weird topic for a blog, but I just had that thought today. Does anyone else have thoughts like this?

A Weird BG Reading & A New Toy!

I have really been trying to check my blood sugar more often than I used to. I want the records & I want to be more knowledgeable with what I need to do for my overall health. Some days I find it easier than other days. Some days I end up with 10 or more readings. Other days I end up with around 5 or 6. It depends on how busy I get at work, or with whatever I am doing that day. I was trying to get some sort of tracking system. I tried SugarStats. I even liked it. It just wasn't as comprehensive as I was looking for. I still use it when I am at work & wanting to log some records. So I started looking at the software for my insulin pump. MiniMed has the CareLink program. You can buy the software or you can have an online profile for free. The only problem was I needed the connector cable to hook my meter & pump to the computer.
I put it off and put it off. I didn't want to spend the $29.99 for the cable. I admit it: I'm cheap. But this past weekend, I ordered it anyway. I just wanted it. I splurged.
It came in the mail today & I am THRILLED with it! It has to be the coolest diabetes toy I've ever had (except my pump). I unfortunately can't figure out how to get these onto my blog page, but trust me, it's cool.
But now for the weird blood glucose reading. I came in from work yesterday. I was on my phone with a friend & got out my meter to test since I hadn't tested after lunch like I normally do. I put in the strip and did the test. The reading was 26. Yup, 26. I thought to myself, "I don't feel bad." I didn't have any symptoms of a low. I usually start feeling it around the 50s or the 40s. In fact, the lowest reading I have ever had on this meter was 38. I was nearly incoherent when I got that reading. I started to get up and get some juice out of the fridge, but changed my mind and tested again. 85. And then I tested again, just to be sure. 83. That's what I went with. But that 26.... that was just weird. Anyone else have a psycho reading like this?

Woman Almost Dies After Bikini Wax

Below is just another reason that we should better control our type 1 (or type 2) diabetes. This article was found on FOXNews.com


Wednesday, July 11, 2007
By Katherine Tweed

'Brazilian' bikini waxes are increasingly popular among women who live nowhere near the bikini-clad beaches of Rio de Janeiro. For one 20-year-old woman in Melbourne, Australia, this routine procedure nearly took her life.
The woman was admitted to an emergency room just two weeks after receiving a the Brazilian bikini wax, a procedure that involves removing even more hair front-to-back than a traditional bikini wax, according to the Brief Report published online in the June issue of the journal of Clinical Infectious Diseases.
"Our case is notable, because it illustrates the infectious risks of pubic hair removal in a patient with diabetes," the authors concluded. "The beauty industry is growing at an unprecedented rate and more invasive and potentially harmful procedures are increasingly available."
The authors of the report warn that anyone with a compromised immune system, including diabetics and people infected with HIV, should think twice about waxing, or any beauty procedure.
While the patient experienced "significant pain" and some bleeding during the procedure, which was performed by a trainee beauty therapist, her health had taken a sharp turn for the worse by the time she sought medical attention.
According to the report, the young woman had poorly controlled type 1 diabetes. She was admitted to the hospital with a high fever, excruciating pain, "grossly swollen" genitalia, and a rash across her chest and neck.
The woman's pain was so intense and the inflammation so severe that doctors were barely able to examine her in the emergency room.
Eventually, the doctors were able to take blood samples and cultures, which came back positive for the potentially life-threatening bacteria, Streptococcus pyogenes.
The patient's weakened immune system put her at risk when she underwent the hot-wax procedure, which caused the infection. A more complete exam, done under general anesthetic, revealed the woman was infected with herpes simplex.
She was discharged after 10 days in the hospital after a steady regimen of antibiotics and other medications that saved her life. While she had regained her health, she had not learned her lesson.
Six months later, the woman again tried to remove her pubic hair, but this time she was shaving herself. She subsequently developed a recurrence of herpes and another skin infection.
She was treated again successfully, but the report noted that, "despite her traumatic experiences, the patient was keen to undertake further removal of pubic hair."
Even for salon customers without suppressed immune systems, this woman's story can be a lesson. Many studies have shown nail salons that do not properly sterilize equipment can easily spread hepatitis.
Every salon patron, especially those getting bikini waxes, should ensure that they attend clean and reputable establishments where therapists regularly wash their hands and wear gloves.
The authors of this report also recommend physicians familiarize themselves with these beauty practices so they can better advise patients about the pros and cons of their beauty regimens.

Pumps, Interviews, and Being Discreet

So I had a job interview today for a new job. I took the morning off from my current job to do this interview. The job is located about two hours from where I currently live. I have friends in this town, so I left work early yesterday and went to stay with them last night. This was so I didn't have to get up at 5 am this morning to make it down there in time for the interview.

I usually carry my pump in my pocket. I don't use the clips unless I don't have a pocket for the pump to go in. Then I use one of my clips.

Unfortunately I didn't think my packing through very well. I took one of my only outfits that doesn't have pockets. And didn't even think to grab my pump clip out of my bathroom when I left.

I didn't realize this wonderful thing until late last night when I was getting ready to lay all my stuff out to get ready this morning. "What am I going to do??" That was all I could think. Where do you put your pump when you don't have pockets???

I thought about Kerri over at Six Until Me. She puts her pump in her sock. Great idea! Except I wasn't wearing socks. I was wearing dress shoes and slacks... So I put my head to work and basically, the only alternative I could come up with was wearing my pump in my bra.

I don't really like to do this for a couple of reasons.

One: It restricts my access to my pump. I can't get to it without looking like I'm trying to flash the world.

Two: It's not the most comfortable place to have something stored. But whatever.

Anyway, that's where the pump ended up spending the first half of my day.

I don't like to advertise that I am a diabetic when at an interview. I don't want to give them any reason to think that they shouldn't hire me. And unfortunately, we know this still happens. So, when it come right down to it, I guess it was a good thing I forgot my clip. It would have been hanging on the side of my slacks for the world to see had I brought my pump clip with me.

What are your thoughts on telling prospective employers about your diabetes? I choose to wait until hired to disclose this information. So far in my life, I haven't had any issues with this.

It happens to everyone...

I hope all have had a good Fourth of July. One filled with lots of friends and family, food, fireworks, & fun.

I spent the holiday at a friends house with her family. Although we didn't set off fireworks, we had fun and cooked out.

I took today off work so it would feel a little bit more like a holiday, instead of just a random day off during the week. But, alas, I must go back to work tomorrow morning. (Sigh...)

Today, however, was a first for me. I've seen it discussed on message boards, talked about time after time in chat rooms, and I have even discussed it with other fellow pumpers that I know. I just could never understand what you were all talking about. "What?" you ask.

Well, today I ripped out an infusion set on accident for the first time ever. In 14 months of pumping, I have never ripped out a set on accident. I have gotten snagged. I have had cannulas bend and clog. But I have NEVER ripped out an infusion set.

I was trying on shoes in Tractor Supply (for those of you who laugh, they really do have shoes and they are really comfortable). I had on my cowboy boots when I went in, so when I was done trying on shoes, I was putting my boots back on. I reached down to pull up my pant leg and yanked up, in the process grabbing my set and pulling it all the way out in one yank.

Luckily we were going to eat and I had a spare set in my purse (from prior experience, I carry all stuff with me). I just snuck in the bathroom when I got there & inserted and new set. No blood sugar spikes, nothing weird. Fairly uneventful except for the fact that I had never ripped out a set before.

Now I know. Now I can relate. And when you fellow bloggers and message board people talk about, I can officially say I relate.

The Knoxville Zoo

A last minute trip was made last weekend. My mother, my baby sister (she's 11), & myself took a trip to Knoxville to the zoo. I hadn't been since I was about 8 and I didn't remember anything about the zoo, other than the gift shop. That would be what an 8 year old would remember.

This impromptu trip was a lot of fun, but I was having a few diabetes crazy days. My blood sugar on Friday, Saturday, and Sunday has been bouncing up and down more than a yo-yo.

I was beginning to wonder if I was getting sick.

The morning started off at 300! Yikes! Down a few hours later to a reasonable 186. You have to remember, it was about 95 degrees outside & we were going to be walking all day long. So I just took it for what it was and didn't bolus.

About 2 hours later I was 60. Figures. An ice cream sandwich, bag of gummie snacks & a hot dog later.... (I am totally thinking I have over treated!) and I check my blood sugar 2 hours later & I am 86. And still dropping.

By the time we got to the restaurant to eat I was 76. And later that night, I spiked back up to 284.

Luckily, I had a blast at the zoo with my mom & sister. And my blood sugars leveled back out by Monday night. Just another crazy few days and back to a semi-normal diabetes life.

JDRF Walk to Cure Diabetes

Well, I've done it... I have registered to do the Walk for Diabetes on September 29th in Nashville, Tennessee. I am excited and scared and a little bit stressed!

This will be the first walk I have done. I have never tried anything like this. I set my goal a little high. I want to raise $1000. I think I can do it, but I have my doubts sometimes. This will be something that I can do for diabetes. And that makes me happy. I want to be able to say I helped in the cure for this disease that is such a part of my life and who I am. I want to be able to say I am no longer a diabetic.

So wish me well and if you want to donate, send me a message. I would be very thankful for any help toward reaching my goal.

My Profile Picture

The picture on this page was taken of me in January of this year. I was a the famed Sardi's in New York City, after spending a wonderful evening watching Mary Poppins on Broadway! This was most definitely a wonderful evening with a good friend, the most expensive food I've ever eaten in my life, a wonderful play that I would recommend to anyone, and a night filled with diabetes drama.

The morning had started out at 5 am in a suburb of Washington DC. I was visiting a friend and we got up early to catch a bus to NYC. When we got into New York we checking into our hotel & set out to explore the city. I carried a backpack loaded down with snacks, extra diabetes supplies, a map, and a camera. All day long we walked & took the subway.

I was on Park Place AND Broadway in the same day. He, he, he! Take that you Monopoly nuts!

At around 5:00 we headed back to the room to get ready for the play. We had planned our fancy outfits (as you see from the picture) and fancy make-up. We were like little girls playing dress up! But it was fun. Until I checked my blood sugar and it was 48. I still have times of hypo unawareness. This was one of those times.

Immediately I started to eat food. You all know that panic mode that we diabetics hit sometimes when we are low. We eat whatever's around and don't really think about it until we have done the worst thing....over treated.

During this time I was also getting ready for the play. We ran out of the hotel room with only about 45 minutes to catch a cab & get to the New Amsterdam Theater. During the rush & the craziness I didn't re-check my blood sugar. And I didn't bolus for all the carbs I ate to correct my low blood sugar.

For the next 3 hours I was completely enthralled by the wonderful show I was witnessing. My blood sugar levels never crossed my mind until the second half of the play when I realized I was thirsty & had a slight headache. Due to low light during the show, I couldn't see to check my blood sugar. So I waited.

When we got to Sardi's, my blood sugar was in the 400's. I nearly had a heart attack when I saw that. I immediately bolused a great deal & asked for water. I must have downed 5 glasses of water before our appetizer even got there. With the sugar levels that high I also had a sick stomach. I ate very little for dinner, even though the food was delicious. I tried to eat almost no carbs, and stuck mostly to the meat & vegetables that I ordered instead.

I hated my diabetes at that moment. It had almost ruined what could have been a perfect night. Before I went to be that night I re-checked and was down to the low 200's with plenty of IOB to take care of the rest of the high blood sugar levels. But it doesn't make it any easier to swallow. The high blood sugar was completely my fault. Due to my negligence. I hope that that doesn't ever happen again, but I have to face the reality that it very well may.

My next purchase... a small keychain flashlight for taking blood sugar in the dark.

Update on the New Infusion Site

So, I wanted to give an update on my new infusion site. The thigh site is working wonderfully. I am actually working on my third thigh site now & am loving them! I can see why people would want to use their stomach (I'm sure I will again), but being able to rotate to my thighs, and giving my stomach a much needed break, is wonderful! It makes me wonder why I waited so long.
On another note, I am trying to get some ideas for a public awareness campaign. Anyone who would be interested, please share some of your stories or experiences regarding the general public and their knowledge of Type 1 & Type 2 diabetes. If you have had an interesting or frustrating experience, let me know. It may spark an idea for how to educate the public.

Can you eat that?

What is it about diabetes that makes people think we aren't normal? Is it the occasional low blood sugar? Is it the need to put your health ahead of whatever other insignificant thing might be going on at the moment? Although I haven't had any recent experiences with people thinking I am strange, I have been dealing a whole lot more lately with the "Can you eat that?" thing.

It is frustrating. I realize that only 5 - 10% of diabetics are Type 1. So people most often hear about Type 2 and controlling your diet, but seriously people! I don't go up to strangers (or even acquaintances) and tell them they shouldn't be smoking. Or drinking. Or whatever else stupid it is they are doing. It is their life. They live it every day. They know the consequences of using tobacco or consuming alcohol. So why would they need me to remind them of that? They don't. So WHY do people insist on giving me dietary advice??

If you are a close friend or family member, this does not apply to you. Most of you don't do this. Or you don't do it often. And you know that I know what I am doing. So, if you occasionally ask me about something I am eating, don't fret. I won't yell at you.
It is the random strangers that I am referring to.

Some times it seems to bother me worse than other times. Here lately I have been on my soapbox about the differences between Type 1 & Type 2. I still don't know where to start. I feel like I can't change anything. I want to be able to tell people about the differences. About the fact that Type 1 isn't something I got from bad diet or no exercise. I want the general public to be more aware of this.

Type 1's may only be one tenth of the diabetics in the world. But we are here. And we do count! It is obvious in most public service announcements that they are putting information out to the public about Type 2. The announcements that are made regarding Type 1 don't mention adults with Type 1. Just children.

Let this be a statement from all Type 1's across the United States! We are here. We are not all diagnoised as children. And those of us who were...we DO live to see adulthood.

If you are a Type 1 diabetic and you feel this way, start talking. Post on blogs, write your congressman or representative. Talk to members of your community. And talk to the strangers when they ask, "Can you eat that?" Let people know that you are alive. Let people know that there is a "lost" group of us out here.

Maybe, someday, the average non-D citizen will understand a little bit more about this illness.

Public Awareness

I am kind of on a rant today. I worry about the state of Type 1 diabetes when it comes to public awareness. I realize that around 90% of diabetics are Type 2. I am not ignorant to that fact. But I think that the public is not well educated on diabetes in general, but in particular when it comes to the differences between Type 1 & Type 2.

I think that the public in general, including a lot of Type 2 diabetics, are ignorant to the differences between the types. That bothers me.

I wish there was some way to start some sort of campaign the inform the public.....maybe I should start one? Who knows.

A New Site!

Okay, so I have been hearing since I started this whole pump deal, nearly 13 months ago, about using different infusion sites other than the stomach. I have toyed with the idea many times, but couldn't really decide what to do. I know from experience that if I put the infusion set too far away from my bellybutton, then the cannula gets bent and I have to rip out the set and start over.

There have been influences to using a different site for me. One would be Kerri with her Six Until Me blog. Kerri often blogs about her site that is on her upper thigh. Another is a young lady that I go to church with. She uses the back of her upper arm most of the time.

Another influence is the build up of scar tissue on my stomach. I have some from the time of MDIs. It was easier for me to inject my stomach a lot of times, than to go to the restroom or another place and inject elsewhere. It has gone down some, but I don't want it to be worse in the future. Not that I have a flat stomach by any means, but I certainly don't want it anymore deformed than it is already.

So today was the day for me. I changed my set this morning, and for the first time, tried a thigh site. So far it has been okay. No bent cannula as of yet. I feel it a little more than I do the sites on my stomach, but I think it might be mental more than anything. Like right after you start with the pump & you always know that it is there.

So far, so good. We'll see how it works out. And maybe a thigh site will become more of the norm for me and give me the chance to better rotate my infusion sites.

A Scary Moment

I had an interesting day yesterday. I woke up with a headache that felt surprisingly like a migraine I had one time. I was feeling like crap & took some headache medicine to try to keep it from getting any worse. About 2 hours after I took the medicine, the headache eased off. Thank God. But then severe heartburn set in right before my lunch. I am not sure why. I rarely, if ever, have heartburn. I did my best at lunch to eat a meal that was low in grease & other heartburn creating foods. It did okay, and that also eased off.

I had a chiropractor appointment that evening and left work a little early to get there in time. When I got there, I checked my blood sugar & was a little surprised to get a reading of 74. I turned my pump off and went on into the office. About 1/2 and hour later, when I got out of the appointment, my blood sugar was up to 86. I like numbers like that.

I went onto Wal-Mart to try to get an organizer for my closet. I didn't find the one I wanted, but I did find a book and a bag of peanut M & M's :D I went ahead and ate them and gave some insulin (not for the whole bag) because I knew I had an hour drive ahead of me and I didn't want my blood sugars to shoot through the roof before I got home.

Fast forward one hour: I got home and fixed myself dinner. A peanut butter & grape jelly sandwich on wheat bread. Yummm. When I checked my blood sugar it was 63!!!! YIKES! When did that happen? I ate first and waited about 35 minutes to bolus. I wanted to give my blood sugar time to come up. Two hours after my bolus my blood sugar was 53!!! What is going on?????? I don't have a clue. I don't know why this is happening. But I ate a zebra cake and didn't give any insulin at all. Yet another hour later my blood sugar is still in the 50s. I can't figure this out.

By this time I am laying on my couch trying my best not to fall asleep. I know it is because of the blood sugars, not because I am tired. My body on auto-pilot, I got a box of honey nut cheerios out of the cabinet and began to eat them straight from the box. All my thoughts are fuzzy. I can't make a coherent thought, I just know that I need to eat something. If I had been thinking coherently, I would have realized that I had juice boxes left over from teaching Sunday School sitting on my kitchen table. This would have taken care of the problem quickly.

One of my friends called me while I lay in my semi-coherent, cheerio eating state. She knew right away that something was wrong by the way I was talking. To say the least, I wasn't forming sentences that made much sense at all. She managed to get out of me what had been going on. That I had been fighting this demon low all evening and I was loosing at this point. She talked to me until I started making sense again & was able to check my blood sugar and it was at a safe 140.

Then she yelled at me. I love her for it. She told me that I should have called to let someone know that I was fighting the lows. "What would have happened if you had gone unconscious?" she asked. I didn't have any answers for her. I live alone. My family & friends call me frequently, but sometimes it may not be frequent enough to catch it if something was wrong.

I wanted to cry. Not because she yelled at me, but because I don't have any answers. And yes, it scares me. I don't know what would have happened if I hadn't been able to eat enough to get the blood sugar up. I was scared. For me, for my friends and family. I have lived alone for years. I don't know that I have ever had an episode that really bothered me emotionally like the one from last night. I was disturbed.

Maybe I should have a roommate. Maybe it isn't smart for me to live alone. I don't even like to think that. I am so independent and I have lived alone for the past 6 years, give or take a few months that I lived with a friend and her husband between jobs.

The ugly monster of diabetes reared it's head last night. No control and no reason for it. I wasn't sick. In fact, when I checked at midnight (on the orders from my dear friend with instructions to call her and let her know what the blood sugars were) I was 110 and this morning, due to over treatment, I was 364.

It was just weird. A fluke. Another thing with this crazy disease that can't be explained and can't be made to go away. No matter how perfect I try to be, it seems like there's always the times like last night that make it almost not worth it.

Unexpected Road Trips....

This cute little guy is a baby Pygmy Hippo. It's bigger now than it was in this picture, but I got to see it yesterday at the zoo in Louisville, Kentucky. He was all cute and lying next to his mother while she watched all the patrons of the zoo carefully.

Now, you ask, how did I end up at the Zoo this weekend? Well, it was most certainly and unexpected road trip.

Since my car accident a couple of weeks ago I have been going to a chiropractor three times a week. It is in the same town that I attended college and is about and hour from my house. One of my oldest and dearest friends lives there with her husband and their 8 month old son (who is the light of my life right now!). I stopped by after my appointment to say hello and to give my baby a kiss. I love that kid!

When I got there, they informed me that they were going to the zoo in Louisville and that I was coming with them. They only just decided to go and thought that I needed to go with them.

I had about a million things to do this weekend, other than take a six hour road trip to a zoo in another state. But, I went anyway, for old times sake. Old times being 2005 when they did the same thing to me, only we went to the Atlanta Zoo. Less than 2 hours notice and all.

All in all, I had a blast. We took lost of pictures, some of which I will be adding after I get them downloaded onto my computer.

The funny thing about this is that it was the first trip of any kind, other than to their parents' homes, that my friend and her husband had taken since the baby was born. So my friend was busy doing her verbal checklist:

Baby food: check

Baby spoon: check

Extra clothes: check

Diapers: check

Formula: check

Bottles: check

Juice: check

It was kind of funny on my part, because with so little notice to me leaving, I also had a verbal checklist that I went through:

Test strips: check

Extra infusion sets in case one malfunctions: check

Glucose tabs: check

Cooler for insulin: check

Vitamins and other meds: check

The diabetes also behaved itself quite well for me. I checked by

blood sugar twice during the time we were in the zoo (about 3 hours). I was letting it run a little high: around 150, since it was 85 degrees outside and we were sweating like crazy. I didn't want to have a low and have to stop to treat it. But there were no major problems. No soaring highs, no scary lows, no malfunctioning infusion sets. I didn't forget anything I needed for the trip, and I didn't have any diabetes related catastrophe of any kind.

Other than the incessant testing, me and the diabetes got along well and basically called a truce for the day. It was almost like living life without diabetes....not that I would know what that is like.

On another note: anyone in the Louisville area should check out their zoo! It was awesome. Much better than the Atlanta Zoo in my opinion. Lots of animals, fun stuff for the kids. You can walk the zoo, ride the train, or take a tram (a little trolley bus). We walked, but if you have small children who are walking, it might be nice to give them a break by riding the train or tram.

I love my friends.

I usually post at night, but while I am home on lunch I just thought I would quickly give all my millions of readers (imagine me rolling my eyes on that one!) a few reasons why I love my friends.

This weekend I had a friend come to Tennessee from Washington, DC. She was visiting her brother for the weekend and with her only being a few hours from me, of course I had to go visit. I also took another friend with me.

I must say I had a blast! My friends make me laugh, they are great support, they tell me when I'm being an idiot, and they take care of me when I can't take care of myself.

I have more friends than the 2 in this picture, but these are the 2 I was with. We went shopping, we had lunch, and even hung out in a hot tub. Basically had lots of fun!

Here's the diabetes related part:

The tall one is my friend from DC. Her brother is a diabetic and also on a MiniMed pump. He was one of the first people I ever met that had a pump and that really helped me to get over my fear of "being attached" to something. She is always understanding and never complains if I say I have to eat or I'm low.

The other girl is also a friend from college. Her dad is a Type 2 diabetic but takes shots, along with some other meds. She understands and is always looking out for me. Sometimes she can even tell if my blood sugar is too high or low before I can. She's just another friend who doesn't judge, cares, and doesn't push me.

It's nice to have friends who can understand diabetes. They may not understand what it is like to have the disease, or to have to deal with it 24/7, but they understand because they have seen their loved ones deal with it. I don't have to explain everything diabetic to them. I don't have to give them Diabetic 101. They just understand. And that is nice.

Midnight & 3 AM

So, I went to bed last night with a wonderful blood sugar reading of 99. I decided this would be the perfect night to do a midnight test and a 3 am test. I set my phone to go off at both of these times, put my glucometer next to my pillow and laid the flashlight next to that. I do this because I am usually too out of it to get up and turn on the light to check my blood sugar. I have found it easier to get right back to sleep this way.
I remember my phone going off at midnight. And I thought I remembered checking my blood sugar. But my alarm clock went off this morning and I remembered that I hadn't heard the phone go off at 3 am. Weird. Then I looked at my glucometer and it showed I hadn't had a test since bedtime last night...guess I dreamed that midnight test.
As for the phone alarm that didn't go off at 3 am. Well, it looks like I turned my phone off in my sleep. Figures. We'll just have to try this again some other night.
At times like this I think I should have a roommate. To basically be sure I don't die during the night. But I have lived alone for so long I don't know if I could handle another roomie. And I always have friends who check on me. I also have a colleague at work who's husband is a Type 1 diabetic. She knows if I don't show up to work and I don't call that someone needs to check on me. I suppose that just my safety net.

I want this bag. I am a bag and purse junkie. I love purses and suitcases and bags of all kinds. I have too many in my closet at this time. I have about a million under my bed. I have learned to nest my bags so that they take up less space in my already small apartment.

Ironically enough, I have been carrying the same purse since Christmas of 2005. I bought it on sale with Christmas money from my dad. I love it. But, it doesn't have room for all of my pump supplies.

Here's where the problem comes in. Previous to pumping, as long as a purse was big enough for my glucometer, it was big enough for me. Post pump, I have to carry two bags, or a larger bag. This is go I have at least two extra infusion sets, reservoirs, extra test strips, glucose tabs, the quick-serter, alcohol swabs, band-aids, and the million other things that I might need if I have a pump malfunction.

That's the part I hate. I have been cruising around on the Internet looking at diabetic websites and that's where I came across this purse. The aDorn bag. There is also a messenger type bag. I don't know that it will be exactly what I am looking for. Or that it will be worth the money that it costs. But I am thinking about asking for it for my birthday that is later this month. I want to see if it would be able to really meet all of my diabetic needs.....

If I get it, I will keep you all updated. If not, I may go into a design frenzy until I make a bag that really does work for me. We'll have to wait and see.

Happy Pump Day!

Happy Pump Day to me! Happy Pump Day to me! Happy Pump Day to meeeeeeeeeeeee! Happy Pump Day to me!!!! And many moooooorrrrrrree.

Okay, today is officially one year on the pump! Exactly 365 days ago I was getting used to this strange machine that was attached to me. A lifeline that feed me my lifesaving insulin, 24 hours per day. And a machine that I wouldn't trade for anything in the world.

The past year has been one of the best of my diabetic life. I have had my rough days. There are still ups and downs. Lows and highs. Days that you just want to cry your eyes out and curse this horrible disease. But in the past 12 months I have kept up a wonderful A1C that is getting better all the time. My health over all has improved and I have lost around 20 pounds. All the wonderful things that have taken place in the past 12 months has taken my mindset about diabetes and my outlook on life and totally turned it around.

I told a co-worker today that a person would have to take my insulin pump off my dead body, because I sure wasn't giving it up of my own accord. I know that the pump doesn't work for everyone. I understand that not all diabetics like the pump and there have even been some to try it and go back to MDIs. But I can promise you, short of something horrible and drastic making the pump financially impossible, I wouldn't give it up for anything.

This little machine that was the idea of Dr John Pickup has drastically changed the lives of many diabetics. And has drastically improved my life. If I could go back, I would have gotten an insulin pump years ago. But no worries, just taking what I have now and using it to the best of its ability (and mine) will help me for the rest of my diabetic life.

I don't say for the rest of my life because I still hold out hope for a cure. Insulin is NOT a cure, only a treatment. I believe that someone will stumble across a cure. Someone will have a idea sparked in their scientific mind and will be able to take this disease away from the millions of people that it effects. But until that day, I will be grateful for this machine that has turned my life around.

So happy pump day!